Monday, February 20, 2012

Rape of a poor language ;)

Few people are bad with grammar and languages. But raping it to the core is a different thing altogether. My higher authorities, for example, speak like a random word generator software. It’s like they know the words necessary to complete the sentence but they just put them in any order, irritating readers/listeners to the extent that we literally scratch our hair. As these people are born entrepreneurs, they refuse to abide by the grammar rules and instead, create their own “raped” version of a sentence. Here are some golden sentences from my friends and some other people.

   If you want(have?) any issues, mail me.
   Why the heck I want to do that?

   You are confusion.
   Asshole, say this to your child. I am not confusion. I have a confusion.

   Please be on top of this issue.
   Thank God, you are courteous enough not to mention the position!

   I am having a bad headache today
   Yeah, as If I get a good one

   This issue is very erotic no?
    Sir, you speak like this in front of the people whose first language is English. And then you complain why aren't we getting enough business from these clients. It’s erratic , you hole.

   (To a Girl) – You will work down with Manoj!
   No wonder I didn't see that girl again.

   I am taking my “wife’s back” to  a doctor
   Haha, lets just hope buddy. You get the point. Don’t you?

   I am taking leave for 2 weeks. So you can expect my absence in that duration
   How hard was that to guess, huh?

   You did it tomorrow, no?
    I just can't take it when people append a "no" to every sentence they speak. And Nope, I will do it yesterday!

   I will brief you "in detail" about this topic today
   Thank you sir, thank you very much. Only Rajnikant or you can do it.

   Would you like to “cum” with me? Ping me.
   No thanks, I would rather “cum” alone :P
  

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

An unconventional valentine Story

This is the first time I felt it worthwhile to post someone's article on my blog. A must read :)


Splash story winners…
This story won the third prize. But it simply deserves the first place. Truly amazing.
Do take sum time to read it. An unconventional valentine story…

Third Place - Prathama Plakkatt

Valentine’s Day is not just for the young or for lovers. It’s the day we celebrate love with person whom we love most and whom we want in our life forever! This fictitious story is about one such person.

Prakriti, as I am called, was born to a single mother but it was when I grew up that I realized the stigma attached to it. So we both went far away from the people who knew us and whom we knew to started life anew, me as student and mom as a teacher. As time flew by, I had become a successful pediatrician, on the way, achieving a state and university ranks and many accolades!

One day as I was at work, I got a call from mom asking me if I can come home a bit early than usual. I felt something amiss as mom never called me during work hours. I immediately applied for an emergency leave and left for home.

The moment I saw her, I rushed to her and hugged her. I felt her softness – she was so soft, her skin full of wrinkles and her warmth had unlimited love – love that you can receive from no other than a mother! I wanted her hug for a long long time, I never wanted her to take her hands off me, but then she pulled me back and took me to her room. In all these years that I was striving for my achievement I had never once gone into her room. But after all these years, I felt like I was entering a museum – that had every single memory, every single achievement, the simplest of the simple beauties of my life!

My mom opened a small box and placed it in front of me and asked me to open it. I thought she had brought some jewellery but to my surprise it was something extraordinary, something precious, something even money can’t buy! She had collected all the things, the tiniest of the tiniest things that I had thrown away – there were hair pins, ribbons, small buttons of my dress, toys, clips, the friendship band that I had got from my friends, greeting cards, the dresses that had torn and I had asked them to use it as spare cloth, rubber bands, the flowers that I had thrown away after cultural programs, the pens, pencils, crayons, painting box and brushes, dissection instruments, nose rings, bangles, earings, bracelets, the letters that I had written to her when I was away from her and even one of my tooth that had fallen – the list is endless. It was a box filled with memories, a box more precious that anything else in this world. She told me how she would look into that each night before sleeping so that she felt closer to her daughter. My eyes moistened on seeing that, I could not speak, I had done an unrepairable wound in my mother’s heart, but she never once complained, even now when she opened the box! I regretted – regretted for not caring for my mom, for my own selfishness, for my own happiness that I had got by suppressing my mom’s wishes and most of all not giving her my TIME – something that will never ever come back.

After a long silence she asked me “Can you be my valentine?” I was speechless! I checked the date – it was 14th February. All through my growing years I had celebrated this day with friends, enjoyed a lot, I had got many gifts too but never once had I thought that my mom could become my Valentine! How wrong I was!

As my eyes filled with tears, mom’s face blurred. I realized what true meaning of Valentine was. All I could say was a simple “YES!” - And it was forever the best Valentine’s Day for me – for life!